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Feb 10

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The one where I tell people NOT to follow their dreams

I can hear the screams of outrage but I just think we might have gone a teensy bit too far with the whole “You can do anything you put your mind to, follow your dreams, no limits, reach for the stars…” stuff.

Please can we accept that we can’t all excel at everything – even if we really, really want it more than anything in the whole, wide world and we’ve dreamed of it all our lives since we were a teeny tot. It is as if the whole silly, six-year-old “When I grow up I want to be a spaceman/doctor/antelope” thing can somehow actually replace careers advice. And work. And aptitude.

Personally, I am at the wrong end of my forties, blind in one eye with a mild connective tissue disorder which means I could develop tennis elbow just from getting out of bed. What if I suddenly announced I had decided to dedicate my life to tennis – a game I have hitherto gone out of my way to avoid – and would not rest until I reached centre court at Wimbledon? Would my friends tell me to go for it? Would they applaud my courage and commitment?

They would not. They would tell me to get over myself.

And then one of them would probably suggest I might have a writing deadline that needs some attention and they would be right. I do. Because, over the course of many years, I have gradually sloughed off the bits of my working life I find hard, unrewarding and alien, even if they were the things that might have much more easily delivered ‘success’. Instead, I have slowly built on a quiet and unflashy aptitude. I have nurtured a flame which I barely recognised, years ago but felt as a deep and satisfying exhilaration at turning out a piece of writing I was proud of; perhaps a paragraph that perfectly expressed an idea, or an opening line that caught the reader’s attention and drew them in. It might have been on an unglamorous topic. It probably was. I’ve written about everything from plastic packaging to mortgage lending over the years, but I have found myself on a path where, with my first novel having sold respectably and a proper, grown up literary agent now steadily helping me to build a career as a novelist, I am slowly achieving what I now know to be my dream. It has taken forty plus years to get to the foothills though. The summit of the mountain eludes me and probably always will, but I will keep steadily plodding on because I find it creatively satisfying. And I have an understanding husband. That helps too.

I don’t lay blame totally at the door of the explosion of talent shows where anyone whose granny is sick enough or story of adversity is sad enough can be catapulted to stardom whether they can sing, dance, play the spoons or – frankly – not. I think it may be more to do with a deeper and more alarming malaise, that a whole generation of young people have been brought up on a mindset where concentration spans are tiny and ambitions are infinite – a sense of entitlement to success – where, genuinely, someone can come up with a daft computer game or a video about a cat doing a funny thing which catches the public imagination and goes global, making them millions in hours. Although the majority don’t, of course.

And it worries me that the deep and abiding satisfaction that comes from honing an aptitude over years – and years – and years – of just quietly ‘doing it’ will not happen for a generation who are being told that overnight ‘success’ – whatever that is – is within their reach just as long as they plead for it passionately enough. The cold, empty light of disappointment will surely follow for most of them. Hopefully then, they will hear the tiny voice within them that tells them where to start on their real journey, not to worldwide acclaim – for the vast majority — but to follow their own path to fulfilment and quiet joy.

Although I do quite fancy being an astronaut.

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